Day 20 of Social Isolation

How is everyone doing? No matter how tough it is for us, it's a hell of a lot tougher for those on the frontline. We have to pull our weight to make their jobs easier.

From our girl, Alanis Morissette's Thank U, Chris Mann has created an ode of thanks to all the hardworking men and women out there who are keeping us all alive while we self-isolate.

Chris Mann Thank U Frontline (Alanis Morissette)

And after you've done that, if you're in Canada, head on over to flatten.ca and log in your COVID-19 data. This resource is being used by doctors and scientists in the country to figure out where we are headed.  It took me about three minutes to plunk in my info.

FLATTEN is a not-for-profit organization platform for collecting and providing real time information regarding the spread of COVID-19 in your local community and around the nation.

Stay home. If you must go out, wash your hands for 20 seconds with soap before and after you return. Don't touch your face! (hard one to remember). And practice two metres of social distancing when you're in public.

The sooner we flatten the curve, the sooner we can get outta here.

Day 12. iTunes Legal. The Sequel.

Two years.
Five DMCA take down notices filed.
One query from an Apple legal representative.
Two emails from beleaguered author.
Result:
https://itunes.apple.com/us/book/the-grey-lady/id560171274?mt=11

I swear I will leave this post up for posterity if they remove The Grey Lady and the last laugh is on me.

Here's the thing: If you are not ready to sell books, then don't sell books. If you don't like dealing with authors and their pissy-diva complaints, then don't sell books. If you want lovely content to lure buyers to your freakishly expensive devices, then you'll be dealing with human beings who write books. If you don't want to deal with them, then don't sell books.

The thing about Corporate Image is it can't just be an image. The way a corporation treats its smallest customer is the measuring stick of their integrity, not a glossy ad campaign telling us you have integrity. I wrote a book. It was published. Shit happened and now we want the book removed from the iTunes Store. Easy-peasy. Literally every other book retailer managed to pull off this wondrous feat as soon as they were notified.

At the moment, I can't enroll The Grey Lady in KDP Select because it is being SOLD on iTunes without permission or payment in direct violation of copyright. This means I can't hold the promotions I planned for this summer. This means lost revenue.

It's not rocket science, Apple iTunes. It's book-selling and if you can't take the heat, get out of the kitchen.

(Speaking of ad campaigns, for the love of God, will the Conservative Party give us a break from those truly stupid Justin Trudeau attack ads? Running them every 15 minutes is not helping. One of the actors carps from a script about Mr. Trudeau's hair and all I can think about is his hair compared to Mr. Harper's hair and then I wonder 'Why am I thinking about hair?' In the meantime, Mr. Trudeau has an ad running about the issues facing middle-class Canadians. No mention of hair. Do the math, gentlemen.)

The Trouble with Kindle Select

If you are traditionally published you delude yourself that your publisher will honour the contract. If you are self-published you delude yourself that you are in control of the contract. I'll say this for Kindle Select--it has a way of disabusing authors of the notion that we are anything but in control.

A Case Study:

On Thu, Aug 28, 2014 at 11:06 PM, Kindle Direct Publishing wrote:

Hello,
We found the following book(s) you've published doesn’t meet the KDP Select content guidelines. Books enrolled in KDP Select must be exclusive to Amazon in digital format during the entirety of their enrollment in the program.
Iced Under (Gatineau Hills Mystery Book 1) (ASIN: B00JR9ZSAW) is available on: http://www.nook.com/gb/ebooks/iced-under-by-nadine-doolittle/2940045818025

Our records indicate that we previously informed you that submitting non-exclusive content to KDP Select is not acceptable and may result in loss of KDP Select benefits.
As a result of repeat violations of the KDP Select exclusivity requirement, we have removed all of your books from the KDP Select program. Your titles remain available in the Kindle Store. Please note that repeat violations of the program’s exclusivity requirement may result in loss of KDP Select benefits, including participation in the Kindle Owners’ Lending Library (KOLL), Kindle Unlimited, and the usage of free promotion days. To ensure KDP Select benefits are not revoked, please be sure that all of your KDP Select-enrolled books are exclusive to Amazon in digital format at the time of enrollment.
Check out this page to learn more about the KDP Select guidelines: https://kdp.amazon.com/self-publishing/help?topicId=200798990#eligibility For all other KDP questions visit: kdp.amazon.com/self-publishing/contact-us

Best regards, Kindle Direct Publishing http://kdp.amazon.com

MY RESPONSE:

How is this even possible! I closed my account with Smashwords months ago which was the only distributor I used for these ebooks. I unpublished them long before that. I fully understand Select's requirements and I have adhered to them. You say there have been repeat violations:

1) The Grey Lady found at iBooks (for which it was removed from Select) was not even the same ISBN! I emailed Apple immediately to remove this previously published edition; the book was removed immediately. I was still penalized.

2) Lie For Me was removed Select although the product page at Kobo clearly indicated the book was not available for sale until after the term ended. I queried before I listed it there and was informed pre-orders were okay. Apparently not. ​​

3) I did everything in my power long before enrolling Iced Under in Select to remove all digital copies. It wasn't enough. Apparently ebook distributors are just as irresponsible as traditional publishers.

Finally, because this is the third time I have experienced trouble "adhering to the guidelines" it is perhaps best if I don't participate in the program. If a backlist book has been published anywhere in the world, the author has no hope of finding every digital copy that has been distributed. I did my very best to make sure I was following the rules and it wasn't good enough.

I give up.

Sincerely, Nadine Doolittle

I know I did what was legally and ethically required of me to remove my ebooks from all channels before enrolling them in Select. But it wasn't enough because the guy at the other end did not do all that was legally and ethically required of him to remove the ebooks from all channels.

And so endth the lesson.

vigil: n. 1. night-time period of staying awake to look after a sick person, pray, etc.

My fledgling career as a writer is either on life support or growing healthier by the second--I have no way of knowing because I'm not there. Literary forces are at work in faraway lands.

Nothing to do but light a candle. Hold vigil. Seek solace in company of same in Rejection and Dejection at Absolute Write's Water Cooler. My personal favourite is: Purgatory's Pit of Doom.

It's funny like a heart attack. Speaking of heart attacks...

A gentleman called my home the other day looking for my Significant Other, but finding me in a weak moment of answering the bloody phone, said brightly: "I understand you're an author."
Me (deep in Slough of Despond): "Um, yep. I, yeah, wrote a book."
Gent: "That's wonderful. You know, a friend of mine--nice guy--had a triple bypass and when he came out of the surgery, he sat down and wrote like crazy every day for like 6 months. The words just poured out of him. And then..."(Gent gives a soft chuckle that speaks volumes) "He shows his writing to an agent and boy! He landed a huge contract with a big publishing house and I think there's even a movie deal. And it all happened in 6 months!"
Me (mercifully too sleep deprived from nightly vigils to feel much): "Wow. That's, um, swell."
Gent (after a respectful silence signalling he expected more enthusiasm from me for his triple-bypass buddy): "And so you're an author too?"

Lessons from the Pit: Writing is not for wimps and triple bypass guys have all the luck.