Because it's June! June, June, June!

You would have to enjoy Broadway show tunes to get the reference. Or live in a cold country.

I'm too busy to enjoy the summer. I have a writing schedule that would fell a horse. To help me out, I recently acquired a headset with microphone to use the Speech-to-Text function already loaded on my computer. It is an amazing tool for getting out that all-important first draft. I can talk out a lot of the subtext in the story and edit it in later. My wrist and back have been killing me from sitting long hours hunched in front of the screen. But it's not like a car that parks itself. My first go at it was only modestly successful. I had to do a lot of editing because APPARENTLY I talk a lot about stuff of absolutely no interest. I bored even myself.

In other news, my daughter is going to have a baby at the end of November. So that will be three grandchildren. Let me tell you something about kids. You tell them to do something and they don't do it. You tell them not to do something and they do it. I specifically said I wanted my fifties to get my ducks in a row before I became a grandmother. Did they listen? No.

I'm thrilled, but also under the gun to get the house finished so I have room to put them all up when they come to visit. Between us, we have four children who are all married or getting married and starting families of their own. Still, after spending ten days with my two-year-old grandson, I'm glad my kids didn't listen to me. That little guy wore me out.

My goals this summer:
1) A rough draft of a new series
2) Daily exercise (I should just 'cut-and-paste' this every month.)
3) Get over snake phobia and weed garden.

2015 Arthur Ellis Awards Shortlist

ACK! I did not make the shortlist but my fellow authors in Ottawa did! Congratulations Brenda Chapman and Barbara Fradkin! If these crime writers are new to you, check out their titles. Gripping, insightful, these writers are masters of the craft. I'm thrilled! I'm jealous! But mostly, I'm thrilled to see their names on the list!

HERE IS THE LIST OF NOMINEES:

Crime Writers of Canada present the 2015 Arthur Ellis Awards Shortlists for Excellence in Canadian Crime Writing.

Best Novel 
Brenda Chapman, Cold Mourning, Dundurn Press
Barbara Fradkin, None so Blind, Dundurn Press
C.C. Humphreys, Plague, Doubleday Canada
Maureen Jennings, No Known Grave, McClelland & Stewart
Alen Mattich, Killing Pilgrim, House of Anansi

Best First Novel 
Janet Brons, A Quiet Kill, Touchwood Editions
Steve Burrows, Siege of Bitterns, Dundurn Press
M.H. Callway, Windigo Fire, Seraphim Editions
Eve McBride, No Worst, There Is None, Dundurn Press
Sam Wiebe, Last of the Independents, Dundurn Press

Best Novella
Rick Blechta, The Boom Room, Orca Book Publishers
Vicki Delany, Juba Good, Orca Book Publishers
Ian Hamilton, The Dragon Head of Hong Kong, House of Anansi
Jas. R. Petrin, A Knock on the Door, Alfred Hitchcock’s Mystery Magazine

Best Short Story 
Margaret Atwood, Stone Mattress, McClelland & Stewart
Melodie Campbell, Hook, Line and Sinker, Northword Literary Journal
Peter Clement, Therapy, Belgrave House
Madona Skaff, First Impressions, The Whole She-Bang 2, Sisters in Crime
Kevin P. Thornton, Writers Block, World Enough and Crime, Carrick Publishing  

Best Book in French 
Hervé Gagnon, Jack: Une enquête de Joseph Laflamme, Expression noir / Groupe librex
Andrée Michaud, Bondrée, Editions Québec Amérique
Maryse Rouy, Meurtre à l’hôtel Despréaux, Édition Druide
Richard Ste Marie, Repentirs, Alire

Best Juvenile/YA Book 
Michael Betcherman, Face-Off, Penguin Canada
Sigmund Brouwer, Dead Man's Switch, Harvest House
S.J. Laidlaw, The Voice Inside My Head, Tundra Books
Norah McClintock, About That Night, Orca Book Publishers
Jeyn Roberts, The Bodies We Wear, Knopf Books for Young Readers

Best Nonfiction Book 
Bob Deasy (with Mark Ebner), Being Uncle Charlie, Penguin Random House
Charlotte Gray, The Massey Murder, HarperCollins
Joan McEwen, Innocence on Trial: The Framing of Ivan Henry, Heritage House
Bill Reynolds, Life Real Loud: John Lefebvre, Neteller and the Revolution in Online Gambling, ECW Press
Paula Todd, Extreme Mean, McClelland & Stewart

Unhanged Arthur for Best Unpublished First Crime Novel 
Rum Luck by Ryan Aldred
Full Curl by Dave Butler
Crisis Point by Dwayne Clayden
Afghan Redemption by Bill Prentice
Strange Things Done by Elle Wild

The winners will be announced May 28 at the Arts and Letters Club in Toronto! Congratulations to all of the nominees!

Stealing in Broad Daylight

Um...

At this very moment I'm listening to the FULL ALBUM of Enya's Greatest Hits on YouTube.

15,909,875 people have tuned in since it was uploaded on November 13, 2013. plata oro is the entity behind the upload and they have 25,140 subscribers.

I don't get it. Did plata oro pay Enya's music label for the right to upload a digital copy? Did YouTube? Was it such a huge cost that the only way to recoup their investment is by running ads throughout? (I just skip 'em. No biggie.)

Has YouTube and plata oro uploaded the album and from the millions of listeners the artist is bound to attract (like me), they make a fantastic profit by selling ads to corporations? ("Psst, guys, I got a vid running on YouTube that has over 15 mil eyeballs. If you want a piece of the action it'll cost ya.")

I never have to pay for this album. It's crazy. I don't get it.

Wait--is this the Utopian Era of Communal Property and no one told me? Well, hot damn! There's a lovely little mansion in Silicon Valley I've had my eye on for some time ... so when can I move in?

Inquiring minds want to know.

(stolen from the National Enquirer. it's their tagline.)

Write More. Write Fast. Write Now.

I'm hard at work every day on two new short series for Kindle Unlimited. I write 3000 words a day. It's not easy. The back is the first to go. The wrist is next. I have 20 years of writing experience. There's no excuse for a pitiful word count anymore. (Except blogging. Blogging is a good excuse.)

Tips For Increasing Word Count:

If you're just starting out, the best thing you can do for yourself is just write like hell. It's going to suck. But it's easier to fix words than it is to come up with new words. Write out of sequence if that helps. Write the bits you're interested in. You can knit it all together later. Revision is your friend. Don't worry, you'll get there. But not until you have a first draft with a beginning, middle and end.

If you have years of writing experience and just want to squeeze more productivity out of your writing time:

1) Know that you can write more. If I can do it, you can do it. Don't listen to the voice that says you can't. You can. You already know how to tell a story, it's a matter of typing it.
2) Don't think when you're writing. You can think later. If you get stuck thinking, skip to the next most interesting thing in your story and think about that. You'll want to write it and hey! there's no reason why you shouldn't.
3) Revise as you go along. Hah! I thought I couldn't do this either. But it's amazing how the brain will cough up corrections to scenes, adjust dialogue, add details, etc. if you just let it do its job.
4) Set a word goal and keep a beady eye on the number. It's your cookie--your validation--it loves you. Feed it and watch it grow.
5) When you get to the end of your novel and it resembles a novelette, DO NOT PANIC. This is where the fun happens. Go back to the beginning and flesh out the chapters with description, deepen dialogue and character, add bits of business. You'll be amazed at how painlessly word count grows to full-length novel.

To Outline or Not to Outline, That is the Question.

Some very prolific writers swear by their outlines. Based on my own experience and hearing from other writers, I think the outline works for a particular type of brain. Many authors start with an outline and then scrap it. I start by writing a first draft and the outline emerges from there as I go along.

If outlining exhausts your creativity when it comes time to write, don't bother with them. If you are inspired and excited by outlining and write like a white hot genius when you get to work, count your blessings. Keep what works, chuck what doesn't.

Is it possible to write a book in one month? I think it is but I think first and foremost, it's better to learn your own mind and take the time to say what you want to say. Ultimately, that's where the real joy of writing lies.

New Series. New Author. Spring.

The first in an eight-book series based on the classic romantic novel, Wuthering Heights by Emily Bronte. Unaware that she is dead, Cathy raps on the window of her old bedroom to rouse Heathcliff to let her in. She has found her way home at last after getting lost on the moor coming from Thrushcross Grange. But so much has changed and Heathcliff's is not the face she sees at the lattice window. As Cathy sets out to find him, she remembers their love and the cruel twists that split them apart. 

In the meantime, Emily Bronte is visited by a publisher's representative named Mr. Dawson who is tasked with advising Ellis Bell to revise his novel. Shocked at finding the creator of Heathcliff is the painfully shy daughter of the local curate, Dawson demands answers. To fight for the life her original vision, Emily must reveal the source of her disturbing inspiration--a revelation that astonishes Mr. Dawson.

AVAILABLE FOR PRE-ORDER ON AMAZON

Fifty Shades of Sheep

Across the street from an Author's house there is a field of sheep. For the most part they stick together at the hay troughs but every now and then something catches the fancy of one or two and off they go.

On this day, it was a book. The story had caught on with a few members of the flock and they ran off to read it from cover to cover. After a short time, hearing the shrieks of glee, several others followed not wanting to be left out. Gradually, more and more of the flock trotted after them, curious as only sheep can be, until only handful of sheep were left near the hay trough.

One of them looked at the others and said "Maybe we should go along just to see what the fuss is all about."

"It is about a movie based on a book about a virgin who wants to be controlled by a billionaire who has issues."

"So it's a romance?"

"Only if you think control is romantic," bleated another. "The girl doesn't want to think and she doesn't have to with the billionaire."

"There must be more to it than that. They seem to think it's Important," insisted a third sheep. He rose up on his skinny legs trying to see over the billboards, television ads and commercial sex shops circling the flock.

"The author made millions and millions from the book and now millions more from the movie. That's why it is Important."

"Ah, so it is a Worthy Piece of Culture."

"The Media certainly think so and the Media are never wrong," intoned an older sheep.

"Then why do we not follow the others and get in on this party!" bleated one of the younger sheep, clearly chomping at the bit. "I, for one, do not like to Miss Out."

"By all means, go if you must. I, for one, have no trouble Missing Out," said one of the sheep who had joined the discussion late. "I Missed Out on Pet Rocks, Cabbage Patch Kids and Tickle Me Elmo. I slept through Twilight and I forgot to turn up for Titanic. But go if you like. It will do you no harm."

"It will do you no good either but that never seems to enter into the equation," griped one of the quieter sheep of the flock.

"Oh, not this again," groaned the older sheep. "This Fad is no different from the days of the Roman circus. We survived that nonsense, we shall survive this."

"There were fewer of us then. It seems like it's much easier these days to fool all of the sheep all of the time."

"You are taking this far too seriously. It is only a movie. I am not going only because I don't like crowds."

One of the flock at the premiere had broken away and was careening toward them at a dangerous speed wearing a black silk mask. The Ewe skidded into them breathlessly. "The movie is even better than the book!" she gushed. "It is very naughty and we're all watching the naughtiness together so it doesn't feel like we're baaad. A documentary filmmaker said this is an insightful phenomenon; women are finally coming out of the closet about their sexuality."

One of the Ewes who had stayed behind rolled her eyes but did not comment for fear of being labelled a prude. She was a prude and she would admit it freely if prudery hadn't become a dirty word within the flock.

The young sheep bolted to his legs and gamboled off after the masked Ewe to catch the second showing of the movie.

The older sheep bent his rickety old legs and settled near the trough. "I suppose it'll be hours now before anyone shows up with anything nourishing for us to eat."

"Hours? It will be years before Culture recovers from this shock. Mark my words. Look at them. The sheer weight of their collective shades of wool has shifted the balance. No one will want to invest in the really nourishing hay after this."

"You are probably right," bleated the sheep who had joined the conversation late. "I found a patch of grass at the fringe of the field. I think I'll graze on that until the fuss dies down and things get back to normal around here."

The rest of the sheep settled near the trough of stale hay to wait for nourishing feed. Some continued to grumble but most were not at all surprised that a book about a girl who did not want to think had struck such a chord among sheep.

The Introverted Author's Guide To Marketing

10 Tips to Flogging Your Books the Introvert's Way:

1) Read KBoards but never post. You don't have to. No one knows you're on the other side of the screen, snooping into the threads. You'll learn just as much and it's almost like being with people, only better.

2) Exercise. Pop a cassette tape into the old VCR--(yeah, you heard me)--and follow a work out led by a really cheerful, extroverted fitness leader. You'll kill two birds with one stone. A workout and socializing!

3) Email. No need to talk to anyone on the phone. Ever.

4) Write books.

5) Put the books on sale occasionally and advertise the sale at carefully chosen sites using this criteria: (a) they will accept your book (b) they offer a reasonable risk of recouping your investment (aka ROI) (c) they don't bug you to tweet stuff for them.

6) Work on improving your storytelling skills by writing more books.

7) Blog if you like it. I do.

8) Don't do anything that bugs you, makes you tense, grates on your nerves or is a time suck in the interest of "building a platform." Write books instead.

9) Do the activities you enjoy doing. I like giving readings where I can talk about the writing process, self-publishing or the writer's life. I'm not crazy about talking about the books themselves because I'm already removed from them by the time they come out. (Huh. Doesn't sound much like a reading. More like talking about books with wine involved....)

10) Join up with other writers when you foolishly commit yourself to hand selling at a fair or some other mad undertaking. You'll be less likely to hide out in the bathroom and therefore sell more books.

Bonus Tip: Write a bestseller and become a recluse.

Inspired by David Gaughran's book: "Let's Get Digital." Introverts need not fear the self-publishing marketing journey. Give it a read.

A big shout out to Draft2Digital for the free gift!